1967年，赌城郊外
各位，欢迎莅临我的地穴 Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to my underground lair.
我面前是世界上的致命杀手 I have gathered here before me... the world's deadliest assassins...
却都杀不死奥斯汀保威 and yet each of you has failed to kill Austin Powers.
让我很生气，邪恶博士一生气 That makes me angry, and when Dr. Evil gets angry...
比哥先生就会心烦 Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset.
比哥先生一心烦 And when Mr. Bigglesworth gets upset...
很多人就没命 people die!
我为什么要被白痴包围 Why must I be surrounded by frickin' idiots?
马斯塔法，法比西娜 Mustafa , Frau Farbissina .
我饶你们一命 I spared your lives because I need you...
是要你们除掉英国的顶尖间谍 to help me rid the world of Britain's top secret agent...
唯一能阻止我的人 the only man who can stop me now.
我们得杀了奥斯汀保威 We must kill Austin Powers!
英国伦敦
片名：王牌大贱碟
来，宝贝，骚首弄姿 Come on, babies. Work with me, people.
给我爱 Show me love.
太好了，宝贝 Great, baby!
哦，乖一点 Oh, behave.
奥斯汀保威 It's Austin Powers!
是奥斯汀保威 It's Austin Powers!
你好，肯辛顿太太 Hello, Mrs. Kensington.
你好，奥斯汀 Hello, Austin
你为什么不让我拍照？ Why don't you ever model for me?
你知道肯辛顿先生作何感想 You know how Mr. Kensington feels about that.
乖一点 Oh, behave.
好，宝贝 Yeah, baby!
喂，我是情报局的艾斯 I'm Basil Exposition with British lntelligence.
邪恶博士今晚设下陷阱抓你 We have just received word that Dr. Evil... is planning a trap for you tonight...
在电子性感小猫摇摆舞厅 at the Electric Psychedelic Pussycat Swinger's Club... here in swinging London.
我们会到那里 We'll be there.
进去吧，来吧 宝贝 . There you go. Come on, baby.
奥斯汀，摇摆舞会 Austin, it's a swinging shindig.
我喜欢的表演，宝贝，好爽 It's my happening, baby, and it freaks me out!
要一杯酒吗？ Can I get you a drink?
好 Sure!
奥斯汀，我们得找邪恶博士 Austin, we've got to look for Dr. Evil.
等等，我有个点子 Wait. I've got an idea.
你干嘛打那个女人？ Austin! Why on earth did you hit that woman?
对，我让你看看，宝贝 Let me show you, baby.
那不是女人，他是男的 That ain't no woman. It's a man, man.
邪恶博士的刺客之一 One of Dr. Evil's assassins.
当心，他有刀 Look out! He's got a knife!
做得好，肯辛顿太太 Good work, Mrs. Kensington.
起来，起来 Get up!
邪恶博士在哪？他在哪？ Where's Dr. Evil? Where is he?
那混蛋在那儿 There's the bastard.
走 Let's go.
借过，对不起 Coming through.
逮到你了，邪恶博士 I've got you now, Dr. Evil.
你这回休想，来吧比哥先生 Not this time. Come, Mr. Bigglesworth!
未来见了，鲍尔先生 See you in the future, Mr. Powers.
"开始冷冻"
我的天，他把自己冷冻了 My God! He's freezing himself.
"胖娃娃"
邪恶博士冷冻后逃脱 And so Dr. Evil escaped... and had himself cryogenically frozen...
等到自由性爱不再流行 to return when free love no longer reigned...
而贪婪腐败统治时再回来 and greed and corruption ruled again.
1997，30年后
科罗拉多州，科罗拉多泉
基默指挥官 Commander Gilmour? Speaking.
我是 Speaking.
我是西南指挥站的瑞特 This is Ritter in Sou-west Com Three.
可能有敌机，飞行航线异常 We have a potential bogey with erratic vectoring... and an unorthodox entry angle.
你在说什么？ What are you saying, son?
好像是胖娃娃的形状 It appears to be in the shape of a Big Boy.
老天爷，他回来了 Good God. He's back.
其实胖娃娃从没离开过 In many ways, the Big Boy never left, sir.
他总是供应物超所值的餐点 He's always offered the same high-quality meals at competitive prices.
闭嘴 Shut up.
要通知战略总部拦截吗？ Shall I scramble Tac HQ for an intercept?
他目前位置在哪儿？ What's its current position?
目前追踪到内华达州上空 I'm presently tracking it over Nevada.
我的天，胖娃娃不见了 Oh, my God! The Big Boy's gone.
听着，忘记你今天所看到的 Listen, son... I want you to forget what you saw here today.
菲利浦 Phillips,
打给总统 call the President.
准备喷射机，旅行袋带着 Prepare the jet, bring my overnight bag...
菲利浦，帮我喂鱼 and feed my fish.
别喂太多 Not too much.
我要前往伦敦 I'm off to London, England.
英国伦敦
鲍尔自愿被冷冻等邪恶博士 Powers volunteered to have himself frozen... in case Dr. Evil should ever return.
希望你的手下能胜任 I hope your boy's up to it.
我们不想像战后那样救你们 We don't want to have to bail you out again like after WW ll.
这是名人区 This is our celebrity vault.
儿童节目主持人
绕舌歌手
请 Please.
谁是奥斯汀保威？ Who is this Austin Powers?
王牌情报员 The ultimate gentleman spy-- irresistible to women...
让女人难以抗拒，敌人丧胆 deadly to his enemies,
当代传奇人物 a legend in his own time.
注意，第一步 Attention. Stage one:
雷射切割开始 laser cutting begins.
雷射切割完成 Laser cutting complete.
第二步，热溶液阶段开始 Stage two: warm liquid goo phase beginning.
热溶液阶段完成 Warm liquid goo phase complete.
第三步，生命复苏开始 Stage three: reanimation beginning.
生命复苏完成 Reanimation complete.
第四步，清洗开始 Stage four: cleansing beginning.
清洗完成 Cleansing complete.
第五步，排泄开始 Stage five: evacuation beginning.
排泄完… Evacuation comp--
完… comp--
排泄完… Evacuation comp--
我在哪里？ Where am l?
你在国防部 In the Ministry of Defense.
现在是1997 It's 1997.
你被冷冻了30年 You've been cryogenically frozen for 30 years.
这些人是谁？ Who are these people?
吼叫是解冻的副作用 The shouting is a temporary side effect... of the unfreezing process.
对，我很难控制我的音量 Yes. I'm having difficulty controlling... the volume of my voice!
这是美国战略指挥官基默 This is Commander Gilmour, U.S. Strategic Command...
包许夫斯基将军，俄国情报局 and General Borschevsky, Russian lntelligence.
俄国情报局，你疯啦 Russian lntelligence.Are you mad?
冷冻期间发生很多事 A lot's happened since you were frozen.
冷战结束了 The cold war's over.
资本主义的猪终于付出代价了 Finally, those capitalist pigs will pay for their crimes. Eh, comrades?
我们赢了 Austin, we won.
哦，帅，漂亮，好耶 Groovy. Smashing. Yay, capitalism.
总统很担心，狂人在逃中 the president's quite concerned. We've got a madman on the loose in Nevada.
邪恶博士 Mr. Powers,
我几时开始 When do I begin?
马上，你跟肯辛顿合作 Immediately. You'll be working with Miss Kensington.
肯辛顿太太 Mrs. Kensington!
肯辛顿太太退休很久了 Austin, Mrs. Kensington has long since retired.
肯辛顿小姐是她女儿 Miss Kensington is her daughter.
她来了 Here she is.
凡妮莎是顶尖的特务 Vanessa is one of our top agents.
我的天，凡妮莎有魔鬼身材 My God, Vanessa's got a fabulous body...
她一定随便跟人上床 and I bet she shags like a minx.
怎么回事解冻让我没内心独白 How do I tell them that because of the unfreezing process... I have no inner monologue?
希望我没讲得很大声 I hope I didn't say that out loud just now.
鲍尔先生 Mr. Powers,
我的工作是让你适应90年代 my job is to acclimatize you to the nineties.
1967年后很多都变了 A lot's changed since 1967.
当然，但只要还乱搞男女关系 No doubt, luv, but as long as people are still having
still having promiscuous sex with many anonymous partners without protection...
同时不计后果的拿毒品实验 while experimenting with mind-expanding drugs... in a consequence-free environment...
我就能适应 I'll be sound as a pound.
危险鲍尔的私人物品 Danger Powers' personal effects.
其实我叫奥斯汀保威 Actually, my name is Austin Powers.
我以为是危险鲍尔 It says here Name--Danger Powers."
不，危险是中间的名字 Danger's my middle name.
好吧，奥斯汀危险鲍尔 Austin Danger Powers .
一套压皱蓝丝绒西装 one blue crushed velvet suit...
好耶 Hey, all right.
一条皱蕾丝领带 One frilly lace cravat There it is.
一枚有男性象征的银章 One silver medallion with male" symbol...
一双意大利靴子 one pair of ltalian boots...
大家好 Buon giorno, boys.
一张唱片，巴卡瑞克畅销金曲 One vinyl record album... Burt Bacharach plays his hits...
一个瑞典制壮阳器 one Swedish-made penis enlarger pump...
不是我的 That's not mine.
购买瑞典制壮阳器的收据 One credit card receipt for Swedish-made penis enlarger...
奥斯汀保威签名 signed by Austin Powers.
我跟你说，宝贝，不是我的 I'm telling you, baby, that's not mine.
瑞典制壮阳器保证书 One warranty card for Swedish- made penis enlarger pump...
奥斯汀保威填写 filled out by Austin Powers.
我不知道这是什么，我没兴趣 I don't even know what this is.This sort of thing ain't my bag, baby.
一本书：瑞典制壮阳器与我 One book: Swedish-made Penis Enlarger Pumps And Me...
我感兴趣的东西 (This sort of thing is my bag, baby)...
奥斯汀保威著 by Austin Powers.
签名吧 Just sign the form.
好，别发火，我会签 Don't get heavy, man. I'll sign it, just to get things moving.
还好吧？宝贝 You're all right, baby.
鲍尔先生 Listen, Mr. Powers.
我高兴能与你共事 I look forward to working with you...
但帮个忙，别叫我宝贝 but do me a favor and stop calling me baby.
你可以称呼我肯辛顿干员 You can address me as... Agent Kensington.
拜托 Oh, come on.
好，那叫我凡妮莎 All right, then...Vanessa.
有那么为难吗？ Was that so hard?
我们得马上出发 Come along. We have to leave immediately.
我们保存了你的私人喷射机 We preserved your private jet just as you left it. It's waiting at Heathrow Airport.
我的喷射大机，太帅了 My jumbo jet! Smashing, baby!
对不起 Sorry.
奥斯汀先生 Mr. Powers.
快，快一点 Quickly. Come on, lad. Let's go.
赌城郊外
各位，欢迎莅临我的地穴 Gentlemen, welcome to my underground lair.
30年了，我终于回来 It's been 30 years, but I'm back.
一切顺利，除了一个小缺陷 Everything's gone perfectly to plan... except for one small flaw--
由于穆斯塔法的技术失误 due to a technical error by my henchman Mustafa...
冷冻过程中出现并发症 complications arose in the unfreezing process.
但我的设计完美无缺 But my design was perfect.
看你把比哥先生害的 Look what you did to Mr. Bigglesworth!
我无法预期冷冻猫的并发症 But, Dr. Evil, we were unable to anticipate... feline complications to the reanimation process--
住嘴 Silence!
提醒各位，本组织不容失败 Let this be a reminder to you all... that this organization will not tolerate failure.
各位，办正事吧 Let's get down to business.
我们有很多事要做 We've got a lot of work to do.
快来人救我 Somebody help me!
我还活着，只是严重烧伤 I'm still alive, only I'm very badly burned.
有些人我认识，有些是初识 Some of you I know... some of you I'm meeting for the first time.
哈啰，上面的人 Hello up there! Anyone!
谁快叫救护车，我很痛苦 Could someone call an ambulance? I'm in quite a lot of pain.
各位是我内阁成员…对不起 You've all been gathered here to form-- Excuse me.
下来 He's down there.
不，没死，严重烧伤 No, not dead--burned. Badly.
我来处理，我找把枪 Me, i found the gun
杀了他 Yes
好 Right
若有人打开门我就能出去 If somebody could open the retrieval hatch down here...
这是我亲自设计的 I could get out. I designed this device myself--
好，真高兴你找到了 Good. I'm glad you found me. Listen...
我严重烧伤，你要是能… I'm very badly burned, so if you could just--
你射杀我 You shot me!
好，继续 Moving on--
你打中我的手臂 You shot me right in the arm!
好，让我一一介绍每个人 Let me go around the table and introduce everyone.
法比希娜 Frau Farbissina .
救世军好战阵营的创办人 founder of the militant wing of the Salvation Army.
随机任务，前韩国摔角手 Random Task--Korean ex-wrestler, evil handyman extraordinaire.
随机任务，让他们见识一下 Show them what you do.
派帝奥布莱恩 Patty O'Brien-- ex-lrish assassin.
前爱尔兰杀手，注册商标： His trademark-- a superstitious man...
留下幸运手镯上的小纪念品 he leaves a tiny keepsake from his good luck bracelet... on every victim he kills.
刑事局很想弄到那个证物 Scotland Yard would love to get their hands... on that piece of evidence.
对，他们老想要我的护身符 They're always after me lucky charms.
为何我每次那样说都会被笑 Why does everyone always laugh when I say that?
他们要我的护身符 They are after me lucky charms!
干嘛？ What?
那是有矮妖精卡通的广告词 It's a television commercial...
三个小孩追着他说 with this cartoon leprechaun... and all of these children are trying to chase him--
我们要找到他的护身符 Hey, leprechaun man! Won't you give your Lucky Charms?"
谷类食品里有很多小软糖 And there's all these tiny bits of marshmallows... stuck right in the cereal...
小孩吃了糖以后就好开心 so that when the kids eat them, they think... Oh, this is candy. I'm having fun!"
最后是我的副手，他叫… Finally, we come to my number-two man. His name...
二号 Number Two .
30年来二号经营"维朱康" For 30 years, Number Two has run Virtucon...
我邪恶帝国的合法幌子 the legitimate face of my evil empire.
邪恶博士，过去30年来 Dr. Evil, over the last 30 years...
维朱康呈飞跃成长 Virtucon has grown by leaps and bounds.
15年前 About 15 years ago
我们从化学制品转到通讯业 we changed from volatile chemicals to the communications industry.
在38个州拥有无线电视台 We own cable companies in 38 states.
克里夫兰的炼钢厂 We own a steel mill in Cleveland...
德州的航运 shipping in Texas
西雅图的炼油厂 oil refineries in Seattle...
芝加哥的工厂制造缩小模型 and a factory in Chicago... that makes miniature models of factories.
一般 Naturally.
当然，各位 Gentlemen...
我有个计划 I have a plan.
它叫做勒索 It's called blackmail.
英国皇室是全球最凯的地主 As you know, the royal family of Britain... are the wealthiest landowners in the world.
皇室不付我们巨额金钱 Either the royal family pays us... an exorbitant amount of money...
我们就让查尔斯搞婚外情 or we make it seem that Prince Charles... has had an affair outside of marriage...
然后不得不离婚 and therefore, would have to divorce.
查尔斯王子确实搞婚外情 Prince Charles did have an affair...
他也已经离婚 he admitted it, and they are now divorced.
好，你们得告诉我这些事 OK, people, you have to tell me these things.
我冷冻了30年 I've been frozen for 30 years.
告诉我，我是老大 Throw me a frickin' bone here.I'm the boss.
需要情报 Need the info.
好，没问题 No problem.
以下是第二个计划 Here's my second plan.
我发展出改变天候的机器 In the sixties, I developed a weather-changing machine...
具有称为雷射的精巧热光束 a sophisticated heat beam which we called a laser."
利用雷射在所谓的臭氧层打洞 Using these lasers," we punch a hole in the protective layer around the world which we call the ozone" layer.
慢慢的紫外线一定会穿透 Slowly, ultraviolet rays would pour in...
增加皮肤癌的机率 increasing the risk of skin cancer.
除非世人付我们大笔赎金 That is, unless the world pays us a hefty ransom.
那也已经发生了 That also already has happened.
妈的 Shit.
用老方法 Hell, let's just do what we always do--
以核武挟持全球作人质 hijack some nuclear weapons and hold the world hostage.
各位，我注意到前苏联共和国 Gentlemen, it's come to my attention... a breakaway Russian republic, Kreplachistan...
要将核子弹头运往联合国 is about to transfer a nuclear warhead... to the United Nations in a few days.
计划如下 Here's the plan.
取得弹头，向全球勒索赎金 We get the warhead and hold the world ransom for...
一百万美金 one million dollars!
你不觉得应该要一百万以上吗 Don't you think we should maybe ask... for more than a million dollars?
时下一百万不算很多钱 A million dollars isn't exactly a lot of money these days.
维朱康一年就赚90亿 Virtucon alone makes over $9 billion a year.
真的？ Really?
很多 That's a lot more.
好吧 OK, then. We hold the world ransom for...
向全球勒索一千亿 one hundred billion dollars!
好帅的巨无霸喷射机 Pretty groovy jumbo jet, eh?
看到爽的可别震惊 When you see this jet a-rockin'... don't come a-knockin', baby!
你必须签这些弃权文件 I'm going to need you to sign these release forms.
弃权文件？ Release forms?
你并非正式为国防部工作 You're not officially working for Ministry of Defense...
这些文件让本部免于事故赔偿 and these forms indemnify the ministry against... any mishaps that may occur in the line of duty.
事故？ Mishaps? But isn't that what being...
干间谍不就是这么回事吗？ an international man of mystery's all about?
好，姓名：奥斯汀危险鲍尔 Name--Austin...Danger Powers.
性(别)：好，来吧 Sex--yes, please!
你这么性感怎么会在国防部 How does a hot chick like you... end up working at the Ministry of Defense?
我在牛津大学有几科很杰出 Well, I went to Oxford... where I excelled in several subjects...
但我专精外语 but I ended up specializing in foreign languages.
我真的很想旅行，看世界 I really wanted to travel. You know, sort of see the world?
真美，到后面爽一下吧 That's fascinating. Why don't we go in the back and shag?
什么？ What?
我要看零件是不是还能用 I've been frozen for 30 years. I've gotta see if my bits and pieces are still working.
你说什么？ Excuse me?
我的鱼竿 My wedding tackle.
你说什么？ I'm sorry--
我的香肠，我的香蕉 My meat and two veg, my twig and berries.
鲍尔先生，拜托 Hello, lads, you still awake? Mr. Powers, please.
请专注你的任务，让性冲动休息 I'd appreciate it if you could concentrate on our mission... and give your libido a rest.
我能不能让你看样东西 Can I show you something?
我不会咬的… I won't bite...
很用力 hard.
好了 All right.
我问你一个问题，老实讲 Let me ask you a question, and be honest.
我让你亢奋了吗？ Do I make you horny?
亢奋了吗？宝贝，有吗？ Randy?
希望这是解冻的过程 I hope this is part of the unfreezing process.
乱流，你看，我摔跤了 Oh, turbulence! Look at that! I've gone over!
又摔跤了 Oh, I fell over again!
鲍尔先生，我绝不会跟你做 I will never have sex with you, ever!
就算世界上只剩一男一女 If you were the last man on Earth and I was the last woman on Earth...
而人类仰赖我们的性爱繁殖 and the future of the human race depended on our having sex simply for procreation...
我还是不会跟你做 I still would not have sex with you.
你的重点在哪儿？ What's your point?
你冷冻精子时说如果你没回来 Remember when we froze your semen? You said if it didn't look like you were coming back...
我们要给你一个儿子 we should try to make you a son...
让你有后代可以繁延 so that a part of you could live forever.
是啊 Sure.
经过几年我们等得不太耐烦 After a couple of years, we got a little impatient.
邪恶博士，请见过你儿子 Dr. Evil, I want you to meet your son.
我儿子？ My son?
史考特 Scott !
你好，史考特 Hello,Scott . Hi .
我是你父亲，邪恶博士 I'm your father. Dr. Evil .
我这辈子没见过你 I haven't seen you my whole life...
你一回来就想要父子关系 and now you come back and just expect a relationship?
我恨你 I hate you.
干嘛？ What?
可以抱一下吗？ Could I have a hug?
不 No
抱一下 不要 -Give me a hug. -No way.I'm not coming over there.
过来 不过去 I'm not coming over there.
快 休想 -Let's go. -Forget it.
快 -Pronto.
你在干嘛？ -What are you doing?
我跟得上时代 I'm with it. I'm hip.
别当我是科学怪人，让我抱抱 Don't look at me like I'm frickin' Frankenstein. Give your father a hug.
别碰我 Hey, don't touch me!
抱抱，抱抱 Hug...
走开，眯眯眼的神经病 Get away from me, you lazy-eyed psycho!
赌城万岁，宝贝 Viva Las Vegas, baby!
欢迎光临赌城 Welcome to Las Vegas, sir.
你要睡床的哪一边？ So, which side of the bed do you want?
你去睡沙发 You're sleeping on the sofa.
我要趁机提醒你 In fact, I'd like to remind you...
同房是为了伪装成夫妻来度假 that the only reason we're sharing a room... is to keep up the context... that we're a married couple on vacation.
好，要先搞还是等会儿呢 Shall we shag now, or shall we shag later?
你喜欢怎样？要先洗澡吗？ How do you like to do it? Do you like to wash up first...
洗奶奶和小弟弟，妓女澡 you know, top and tails, whore's bath?
我个人办事前喜欢验收 Before I'm on the job, I like to give my undercarriage... a bit of a how's-your-father.
开玩笑的，我只想博君一笑 I'm just joking. I'm just trying to get a rise out of you... for shits and giggles.
打开行李吧 Let's unpack.
哎呀，大家留意 Blimey... nerd alert!
这怎么会在这儿？ How did this get in here?
有人跟我恶作剧 Somebody's playing a prank on me.
真的不是我的 Honestly, it's not mine.
嘿，美国人 Hey, Americans!
请享用美酒，你来了啊？ Enjoy that wine. There you are.
我认识你吗？ Do I know you?
不，你人是在这儿啊 No, but that's where you are. You're there.
赌城万岁，宝贝，你好吗？ Viva Las Vegas, baby.
奥斯汀 Austin
赌城有一家公司叫维朱康 There's a company in Las Vegas called Virtucon...
可能跟邪恶博士有关 which we think may be linked to Dr. Evil.
很多主管到这家赌场赌博 Plenty of Virtucon executives are gambling in this casino.
太帅了，走 Smashing. Let's go.
那边就一个 There's one over there.
换一千 Changing a thousand.
对不起 Excuse me.
我可以加入吗？ Do you mind if I join you?
没问题 Not at all.
21点，各位 The game is blackjack, gentlemen.
最少下注一万 Ten thousand dollars minimum bet.
你是老K，你3点 King for you, sir, and a three for you.
17点 Seventeen?
发牌 Hit me.
你17点了，先生 You have 17, sir.
我喜欢活在危险中 I like to live dangerously.
4，21点 Four. Twenty-one.
5点 Five. 5 .
不要了 I'll stay.
我建议你要，先生 I suggest you hit, sir.
我也喜欢活在危险中 I also like to live dangerously.
随便你 As you wish, sir.
20点赢你的5点，抱歉 Twenty beats your five. I'm sorry, sir.
我不会骗你 I won't lie to you.
玩扑克牌我不行 Cards are not my bag, baby.
请容我自我介绍 Allow myself to introduce... myself.
我叫瑞奇卡宁汉 My name is Richie Cunningham,
这是内人奥普拉 and this is my wife Oprah.
我叫二号 My name is Number Two.
这是我的机要秘书奥拉塔 This is my ltalian confidential secretary. Her name is Alotta...
奥拉塔"花痴啦" Alotta Fagina.
再说一遍？ Come again?
奥拉塔法兹纳 Alotta Fagina.
抱歉，我没听懂，你好像说… I'm just not getting it. It sounded like you said your name was a lot of...
算了 Never mind.
你从事哪一行？二号先生 What exactly do you do, Mr. Number Two?
那是我的事 That's my business.
恕我失陪，我要上洗手间 If you'll excuse me, I have to go to the little boys' room.
监视那个意大利女人 You keep your eye on the ltalian bird.
在饭店套房会合 We'll rendezvous back at the hotel suite.
你没看到…任何东西吧 You didn't happen to see... anything at all?
抱歉 Sorry.
你好 Howdy.
你那身装扮不太正常 That is one crazy getup you got there, fella.
谢谢 Thank you.
你演舞台剧吗？ Are you in the show?
不，其实我是英国人 No, actually, I'm English.
你真可怜 I'm sorry.
老兄，好好上 Hey, partner?
好 OK.
放松，小心，别伤到肛门 Partner, relax. Don't force it. Gonna blow out your o-ring, drop a lung.
二号为谁工作？ Who does Number Two work for?
对，让大便知道谁是老大 That's right, buddy. You show that turd who's boss.
抓住东西，咬紧牙关，用力 Grab ahold of something, bite your lip, and give it hell.
我们会熬过去 We're gonna get through this.
听起来很脏，冲一下水吧 That sounds pretty nasty. How about a courtesy flush over there?
天哪，你吃了什么？ Jesus Christ, boy. What did you eat?
各位，我们拥有核武了 Gentlemen... the warhead is ours.
帮我接联合国秘密会议室 Patch me through... to the United Nations security secret meeting room.
各位，我是邪恶博士 Gentlemen, my name is Dr. Evil.
不久你们将发现核弹不见了 In a while you'll notice... the Kreplachistani warhead has gone missing.
想要回来，你们得付我… If you want it back, you're going to have to pay me...
一百万美金 one million dollars!
抱歉 Sorry.
一千亿美金 One hundred billion dollars.
各位，肃静 Gentlemen, silence.
邪恶先生 Now, Mr. Evil--
是博士，我在邪恶学院有拿到学位 Dr. Evil. I didn't spend six years in evil medical school...
多谢 to be called mister, thank you very much.
联合国政策不与恐怖份子交涉 It is the policy of the United Nations... not to negotiate with terrorists.
真的？再会了 Really? So long.
各位，整整五天后 Gentlemen, in exactly five days,
我们将赚进一千亿美金 we will be $100 billion richer.
肯辛顿太太伦敦寓所
喂，凡妮莎，奥斯汀好吗？ How's Austin?
他在睡觉 He's asleep.
你没有吧？ You didn't.
天哪，没有 God,no
我让他睡沙发上 I made him sleep on the sofa.
凡妮莎，我以你为傲 Vanessa, I'm proud of you.
为什么 Why?
因为你能抗拒奥斯汀的魅力 Because you've managed to
他很想诱惑我，我不为所动 God knows he tried, mummy.I actually had to end up being rather firm with him.
看看他的牙齿，真是有够糟 What about his teeth? It's really bizarre.
达令，你要了解 You have to understand,
在60年代的英国 in Britain in the sixties...
一口烂牙还是能当性感象征 you could be a sex symbol and still have bad teeth.It didn't matter.
你有… Did you ever?
当然没有，我嫁给你爸 Me? No, of course not. I was married to your father.
你从没想过和他上床？ Did you ever want to?
奥斯汀很迷人，温文儒雅 Austin is very charming... very debonair.
英俊，机智，懂得品酒 He's handsome, witty... has a knowledge of fine wines.
女人要他，男人想当他 Women want him, and men want to be him.
最王牌的国际间谍 He's every bit an international man of mystery.
你没回答我的问题，妈咪 You didn't answer my question.
我知道 I know.
这样说好了 Let me just say this--
奥斯汀是最忠诚关注的朋友 Austin was the most loyal
我将永远爱他 I will always love him.
想跟他讲话吗？ Do you want to speak to him?
不，太久了 No. It's been too long.
我要挂了，妈咪，我爱你 I'm going to have to go, but I love you.
再见，达令 Ciao, darling.
维朱康全球总部
有辆礼车停下来了 A limo's just pulled up.
让我看 Let me see.
那是邪恶博士的猫 你怎么知道？ That's Dr. Evil's cat. How can you tell?
我不会忘记有毛的… I never forget a pussy...
小猫 cat.
糟糕，他逃走了 Oh, no. He's gone away.
我的天，凡妮莎，你好美 My God, Vanessa, you are so incredibly beautiful.
对了，好，好 That's it.
来，达令 Come on, darling...
我带你出去狂欢一夜 I'm gonna take you out for a night on the town.
各位，巴克瑞克先生 Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Burt Bacharach.
What the world...
Needs now...
Is love...
Sweet love.
No, not just for some...
But everyone.
来啊，快点 Austin, get on with it.
我会做，你要我做吗？ I'm going to do it.
要 YES
右手放在绿色上面 Right hand green!
没事吧 You all right?
你知道吗? You know what?
等一下，我把东西忘在大厅 Wait a tick. I forgot something in the lobby.
我走楼梯吧 Why don't I take the stairs?
可以搭手扶梯干嘛走楼梯 Why take the stairs when I could take the escalator?
有独木舟干嘛搭手扶梯 Why take the escalator when I've got a perfectly good canoe?
我知道了，我搭电梯 I know what-- I'll take the elevator.
奥斯汀 Austin
来喝点香槟 Come have some champagne with me.
哦，我绊到了 Oh, I tripped.
我大学以后就没这么开心 I haven't had this much fun since college.
我很遗憾 I'm sorry.
为什么？ Why?
你的拘谨不见了 I'm sorry that bug up your ass had to die.
总之你实在爱玩到有点脱"壳" Always wanting to have fun, that's you in a nutshell.
不，我是在壳里面 No, this is me in a nutshell.
救命，我在壳里 Help! I'm in a nutshell!
我怎么会在壳里？ How did I get into this nutshell?
瞧这么巨大的胡桃壳 Look at the size of this bloody great big--
哪种壳会有这种胡桃，疯了 What sort of shell has a nut like this? This is crazy.
瞧你 Look at you.
喝醉了 You're smashed.
我没有 No, I'm not.
你有 Yes, you are.
我很理性，所以我不喝酒 No, I'm the sensible one. I'm always the designated driver.
吻我 不行 Kiss me. I can't, darling.
为什么 Why not
你喝醉了，这样不对 You're drunk. It's not right.
不，我了解妈咪为何喜欢你 I'm not drunk. I'm just beginning to see... what my mummy was talking about all those years ago.
我不能 I can't.
告诉我妈咪在60年代的故事 Tell me all about my mummy in the sixties. I'm dying to know what she was like.
她很时髦 She was very groovy.
你爸很爱她 Your dad loved her very much.
如果有人能像你爸那么爱她 If there was one other cat in this world that could have loved her...
那就是我 and treated her as well as your dad it was me.
但不幸的是我 But unfortunately for yours truly...
错失了良机 that train has sailed.
凡妮莎，凡妮莎 Vanessa,Vanessa,
翻过去，该睡了 Come on, roll over. Sleepytime.
请把手还我 Austin needs his hand back.
你有邮件 You got email
你好，奥斯汀 hello Austin
我是情报局的艾斯 This is Basil Exposition from British lntelligence.
查出维朱康在火神计划的角色 I want you to find out what part Virtucon plays in something called Project Vulcan.
你马上到法兹纳的阁楼 Go to Alotta Fagina's penthouse immediately.
奥拉塔法兹纳的阁楼
好，太棒了，好 Great.
火神计划
大胆，来，宝贝，来啊 Come on, baby, give it to me. Cheeky, huh?
你好像很惊讶会看到我 You seem surprised to see me, Miss Fagina.
有何贵干？卡宁汉先生，是吧 What do you want... Mr. Cunningham, was it?
你的老板二号先生 Your boss, Number Two...
好像涉及大型地下挖掘工作 I understand that cat's involved in big underground drills.
你怎么知道？ How did you know?
我不知道，你刚刚告诉我的 I didn't, baby.You just told me.
晚点再谈生意 We can talk about business later.
我换上轻便的衣服 Let me slip into something more comfortable.
乖一点 Oh, behave.
老天呀 Good God.
进来 Come in...
我让你看你想知道的一切 and I'll show you everything you need to know.
要我帮你洗吗？ May I wash you?
帅，宝贝 Groovy, baby.
感觉好好吃 That feels yummy.
奥斯汀保威，王牌情报员
在日本都是男人比女人先高潮 In Japan, men come first, and women come second.
有时候根本没高潮 Or sometimes not at all.
想来点清酒吗？ Care for some sak?
给我来点 Sak?it to me, baby.
好色哦 Kinky.Klinky.
感觉怎么样？卡宁汉先生 How do you feel, Mr. Cunningham?
我觉得非常轻松 I feel extreme relaxation.
你竟然在我面前放屁 How dare you break wind before me?
抱歉，我不知道轮你放 I'm sorry. I didn't know it was your turn.
原谅我的粗鲁，那不是我 Pardon me for being rude.
是我吃的东西冒出来问好 It was my food. It just popped up to say hello...
又回到下面了 and now it's gone back down below.
真美，谢谢 That's beautiful.Thank you.
我们来做爱 Let's make love...
你这个毛茸茸的傻小子 you silly hairy little man.
哟哟，哈啰 I say! Hello, vicar.
就是那边，你瞧瞧，天哪 That's the spot, all right.That's the spot right there. Look at that, now.
奥斯汀保威太接近了 Austin Powers is getting too close.
有建议吗？ Any suggestions?
我创造了终极武器击败他 I have created the ultimate weapon to defeat Austin Powers.
把女机器人带来 Bring in the fembots!
去吧女机器人 Go, fembots!
人类复制科技中的先进技术 These are the latest word in android replicant technology.
致命，有效，残忍 Lethal, efficient, brutal.
没有男人抗拒得了魅力 No man can resist their charm.
叫警卫来 Send in the guards!
杀了这些女人 Kill these women.
令人印象很深刻 Quite impressive.
谢谢，博士先生 Thank you, herr doctor.
我喜欢那种"口径"的女孩 I like to see girls of that...caliber.
哦，我指的是双枪管的大小 By caliber, of course I mean both the size of their gun barrels...
还有优质个性，同音异义 and the high quality of their character.It's two meanings. Caliber--it's a homonym.
算了 Forget it.
英国临时总部
稍息 At ease, boys.
奥斯汀，给你看样东西 I want to show you something.
我们给你配备这个 We're going to outfit you with this.
看起来像表 It looks like a watch, but, in fact...
其实是对地静止的定位装置 it's a geosynchronous positioning device.
帅呆了 Very shagadelic.
然后是这个 And then there's this.
好，让我猜 Let me guess.
牙线是绞丝，牙膏是塑胶炸药 The floss is garrote wire the toothpaste is plastic explosives...
牙刷是引爆器 and the toothbrush is the detonation device.
其实不然，由于你被冷冻 No, actually.Since you've been frozen
牙医界有不可思议的进步 there have been fabulous advances in the field of dentistry.
什么意思？ What do you mean?
没什么 Nothing.
瞧，贝索来了 Here's Basil.
你好，艾斯先生 Hello Exposition .
让我告诉你最新状况 Let me bring you up to speed.
邪恶博士挟持核子弹头勒索 Dr. Evil has hijacked a nuclear warhead from Kreplachistan.
只有两件事吓得了我 Only two things scare me,
一是核子弹头 and one is nuclear war.
另一个呢？ What's the other? Excuse me?
还有什么吓得了你？ What's the other thing that scares you?
跑江湖的 Carnies.
跑江湖的？ Carnies.?
马戏团团员，闻起来像甘蓝菜 Circus folk. Nomads, you know.Smell like cabbage.
他们的手都小小的 Small hands.
是吗？ Indeed.
这可能是最后几张拼图 Perhaps these photographs are the last piece of the puzzle.
我揭发了火神计划的细节 I've uncovered the details of Project Vulcan.
天哪，地下飞弹？ Oh, good God. An underground missile?
你在哪儿找到的？ Where did you find these?
他昨晚到法兹纳的阁楼侦察 Austin did some reconnaissance work last night at Alotta Fagina's penthouse.
下一步是渗透，有想法吗？ Our next move is to infiltrate Virtucon.Any ideas?
维朱康每小时有设施参观 Virtucon runs a tour of its facility every hour.
我们可以扮成观光客现场勘察 I thought we could disguise ourselves as tourists and do some on-site reconnaissance.
做得好，肯辛顿 Top drawer, Kensington.
我给你介绍一个人 Austin, I'd like you to meet somebody.
这是家母，艾斯太太 This is my mother-- Mrs. Exposition.
你好 How do you do?
我的天，你干什么？ My God, man, what have you done?
那不是你妈，那是个男的 That's not your mother. It's a man, baby!
这顶假发怎么扯不下来 Get off! Come on! Why won't this wig come off?
奥斯汀 Austin
等等，马上就好 Hold on one second.
不，我的妈，妈，你没事吧 Let go of my mother!Are you all right?
你疯了不成？ Austin, have you gone mad?
你有得解释了 You have a lot of explaining to do.
对不起，我以为她是男人 I'm sorry. I thought she was a man.
可恶，你讲的是我母亲哎 Damn it, you're talking about my mother!
你得承认她很像男人 You have to admit, she is rather mannish.
恕我冒昧，她要是女的 No offense, but if that is a woman...
那她真是丑的可以了 it does look like she was beaten with an ugly stick.
你真是的 Really, Austin.
在这美好的情绪下你得说些话 Give in to the beauty of your feelings and say the words.
来 Come on.
我爱你，爸 I love you, Dad.
我也爱你，儿子 I love you, too, son.
好，今天有新来的朋友 Group, we have some newcomers here today with us.
向史考特及他父亲问好 Say hello to Scott and his father
"谢恶"博士？ Mr...Avil?
其实是邪恶 Evil, actually.
邪恶博士 Mr Evil
邪恶博士好，史考特好 Hello Dr.Evil,Hello Scott .
大家好 Hello, everybody.
史考特，从你开始吧 Scott, why don't we start with you?
你今天怎么会到这儿？ What brings you here with us today?
我五天前头一回见到我爸 I just really met my dad for the first time 5 days ago.
在这之前我被冰冻起来 I was partially frozen his whole life.
听到你承认真是太好了 That is beautiful that you can admit to that.
他回来就要我接掌家族企业 He comes back and wants me to take over the family business.
不然我死后谁来接掌世界 But, Scott, who's going to take over the world when I die?
听清楚他的意思 "我死了后谁来接管全世界?" Listen to the words he used-- Who's going to take over the world when I die?"
有时候是会有那种感觉 It feels like that to some of us sometimes, doesn't it?
你想做什么？史考特 What do you want to do, Scott?
不知道，我想我喜欢动物 I don't know. I was thinking I like animals.
也许我会当兽医 Maybe I'd be a vet.
邪恶兽医？ An evil vet?
或许在动物园做事 No. Maybe work in a petting zoo.
邪恶动物园？ An evil petting zoo?
你每次都这样 You always do that!
我想他恨我 I think he hates me.
我真的认为他想杀我 I really think he wants to kill me.
这边不互相残杀 Scott, we don't want to kill each other in here.
或许会说，但不会做的 We might say that we do sometimes...but we really don't.
这孩子很狡猾，我是想杀他 Actually, the boy's quite astute. I really am trying to kill him, but, so far, unsuccessfully.
但都没成功，他跟他爸一样诈 He's quite wily, like his old man.
这就是我所说的 This is what I'm talking about.
好，我们听完你的故事了 We've heard from you, Scott.
跟我们谈一谈你自己 Now you tell us something about yourself.
我的人生乏善可陈 The details of my life are quite inconsequential.
说说你的童年 Please. Let's hear about your childhood.
很好，我从哪儿开始 Very well. Where do I begin?
我爹是冷酷的比利时面包师 My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium
有低级的嗜眠症和偷窃癖 with low-grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery.
家母嫁给父亲才15岁 My mother was a 15-year-old
她是脚有蹼的法国妓女 French prostitute named Chloe... with webbed feet.
家父很风流，酗酒 My father would womanize, drink.
他竟然声称他发明了问号 He would make outrageous claims Iike he invented the question mark.
有时候他会指责栗子懒惰 Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy...
唯独天才具有的那种抑郁 the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.
我的童年很典型 My childhood was typical--
夏天在仰光上滑橇课 summers in Rangoon, luge lessons.
春天我们做肉头盔 In the spring, we'd make meat helmets.
无礼时被装在麻布袋里毒打 When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds.
其实很平常 Pretty standard, really.
12岁我被划了第一刀 At the age of 12, I received my first scribe.
14岁一名教徒修我的睾丸 At the age of 14, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles.
短阴囊是最棒的 There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum.
奉劝各位试试 It's breathtaking. I suggest you try it.
我们必须停止了 You know, we have to stop.
可以跟你说句话吗？ Austin, can I have a word with you?
当然可以 Of course you may, luv.
我知道我很神经质 I know I'm being neurotic, but I can't shake off...
我不禁怀疑那个意大利秘书 this suspicious feeling about that ltalian secretary.
法兹纳小姐 You know, Miss Fagina.
我不想疑心病太重 I don't want to sound paranoid...
但我谈过不愉快的感情 but I've had some bad relationships in the past...
我出了名爱吃醋，抱歉 and I have been known to be jealous.I'm sorry.
别抱歉，宝贝 Don't be sorry, baby.
你怀疑是对的，我搞过她 You're right to be suspicious.I shagged her.
什么？ What?
我猛操她，对 I shagged her rotten, baby!
我不敢相信，她让人反感 I don't believe you. She was repellent.
给二号桌一碟牛奶 Saucer of milk, table two.
你采取保护措施吗？ But did you use protection?
当然，我有90手枪 Of course. I had my nine-millimeter automatic.
我是说你用保险套吗？ I meant did you use a condom?
水手才用保险套，宝贝 Only sailors use condoms, baby.
在90年代不是 Not in the nineties. Well, they should, those filthy beggars.
他们这些港口流浪人应该要用 They go from port to port.
凡妮莎，别生气 Don't have a thrombo.
奥拉塔对于我没意义 Alotta meant nothing to me.
对于我有 It means something to me.
如果你要跟我谈感情 If you want us to have a relationship...
记住时代不一样了 get it into your head that times have changed.
你不能随便乱搞 You can't just go off shagging anybody anymore.
就算你能我也不会这样 And if you could, I wouldn't, because I'm not like that.
凡妮莎 Vanessa
你是我的一切 You're everything to me.
你不懂，是不是？ You just don't get it, do you?
晚安，欢迎到90年来 Good night, Austin. Welcome to the nineties.
你会很孤独 You're going to be very lonely.
Check this guy out.
和平，和平 Peace.
吉米汉德瑞克斯，已故 Jimi Hendrix--deceased.
毒品 Drugs.
珍妮丝裘别林，已故，酗酒 Janis Joplin. Janis Joplin .Deceased, alcohol.
妈妈卡斯，已故 Mama Cass. Deceased,
火腿三明治 ham sandwich.
太好了，照明还可以吗？ That's great. Is the lighting halfway decent?
国旗升起了，看得到星条旗 Yes, indeed. They got the flag up now. You can see the stars and stripes.
真漂亮 Beautiful. Just beautiful.
早，奥斯汀 Good morning, Austin.
我忘记你错过了30年 I sometimes forget... you've missed out on the last 30 years.
柏林围墙倒塌 Fall of the Berlin Wall...
英国有女首相 the first female British Prime Minister...
种族隔离结束 end of apartheid.
我不相信洛赫逊是同性恋 Yeah, and I can't believe Liberace was gay.
女人爱他，那我倒没料到 I mean, women loved him.I didn't see that one coming.
参观即将开始，请坐下 The tour is about to begin so if you'll please take your seats...
欢迎到维朱康 Welcome to Virtucon, company of the future.
未来的企业 Virtucon is a leading manufacturer of many items...
本公司是家用产品的领先厂商 you can find right in your very own home.
你觉得她比我漂亮吗？ Do you think she's prettier than me?
谁？ Who?
你知道谁 You know who.
意大利妞，不，她臭死了 Oh, the ltalian bird. No, baby. She's rancid.
我觉得你很棒，十全十美 I think you're shagadelic, baby.You're switched on. You're smashing.
我们生产钢铁，石油制品 We make steel, petroleum products...
挥发性化学制品 and volatile chemicals.
别担心意大利妞的事 But don't worry about the ltalian bird.
她是北港香炉人人插 She's the village bicycle.Everyone's had a ride.
右手边是通往禁区的门 On your right, you'll notice a door Ieading to a restricted area.
获得批准才能进入 Only authorized personnel are allowed...
我对付他，你对付她 I'll take him. You take her.
走 Let's go.
我是波顿，出问题了 It's Bolton. We've got a problem.
有人闯入大楼内 Intruders in the complex.
当心 Watch out.
这边 -Halt. -This way.
柔道劈功 Judo chop!
他们来了 They're coming!
等等，加速，当心，让开… Hang on. I'm going to floor it.Watch out. Move!
小心，奥斯汀 Careful, Austin.
当心 Watch out!
走吧，我们快走 Come on, let's go.
谢天谢地我们成功了 Thank goodness we made it.
保持冷静，宝贝 Stay very cool, baby.
鲍尔先生 Mr. Powers
欢迎莅临我的地穴 Welcome to my underground lair.
你正好赶上，请欣赏 You're just in time.Enjoy the show.
各位，我给你们火神 Gentlemen, I give you the Vulcan...
全球最强力的地下钻孔机 the world's most powerful subterranean drill.
那让你亢奋吗？ Does that make you horny?
先别吵 Not now, Austin.
强到能穿透地壳 So powerful, it can penetrate the earth's crust...
将50千吨核子弹头送入地心 delivering a 50-kiloton nuclear warhead deep into the liquid hot core of the planet.
引爆后全球的火山都会爆发 Upon detonation, every volcano on earth will erupt.
除了付赎金似乎别无选择 It seems we have no choice but to pay your ransom.
你们收到指示了，再见 You have my instructions. Bye-bye.
你看，她有三颗奶 Check it out, butt-head. This chick has three boobs.
有几个屁股？ How many butts does she have?
喜欢你的准未来服装吗？ Do you like your quasi-futuristic clothes?
我亲自设计的 I designed them myself.
史考特，儿子，你好吗？ Scott, my boy, how are you?
今天怎么样？ How was your day?
我朋友小杰带我到商场去 My friend Sweet Jay took me to that video arcade in town.
他们不说英文，小杰就动手 They don't speak English, so Jay got into a fight...
他说别烦我，我不会说法文 and he's all, Quit hassling me 'cause I don't speak French."
那个人说法文，我说让开 And then the guy says something in Paris talk and I'm like, Just back off."
他们说滚，我们说来赶啊 And they're all, Get out." And we're like, Make me."
好酷 It was cool.
有意思，今晚打算做什么？ Fascinating.What are your plans for this evening?
待家里，电视上要演三级片 I thought I'd stay in.There's a good titty movie on Skinimax.
你打算那么过日子？ And that's how you'd like to live your life?
对啊 Yeah
很可能 Pretty much. What?
我给你介绍爸的死对头 Scott, I want you to meet Daddy's nemesis Austin Powers.
奥斯汀保威 Austin Powers
你请他吃饭？杀了他算了 Are you feeding him? Why don't you just kill him?
不，我有更好的计划 I have an even better idea.
我故意让他容易脱逃 I'm going to place him in an easily escapable situation...
最后却死得很惨 involving an overly elaborate and exotic death.
现在就杀了他嘛 Why don't you just shoot him now?
我有枪，一起动手，会很好玩 I'll go get a gun. We'll shoot him together.
砰，挂了 It'll be fun. Bang! Dead. Done.
再偷看就要被禁足，我说真的 One more peep out of you and you are grounded, mister and I am not joking.
好，开始吧 All right. Let's begin.
你真的希望他们付钱？ You really expect them to pay?
我希望他们死 I expect them to die.
付钱后我会拿热岩浆 Even after they pay me the money...
融掉地球上每座城市 I'm still going to melt every city on the planet with liquid hot magma.
放出鲨鱼 Release the sharks!
注意鲨鱼头上有雷射光束 You'll notice that all the sharks have laser beams attached to their heads.
每个人都应该吃熟食 I figure every creature deserves a warm meal.
关于鲨鱼 Dr. Evil, it's about the sharks.
你冷冻时它们变成绝种动物 When you were frozenthey were put on the endangered species list.
我们试着弄到，但要几个月 We tried to get some... but it would've taken months to clear up the red tape.
我有个简单的要求 I have one simple request...
头上装雷射光束的鲨鱼 and that is to have sharks with frickin' laser beams attached to their heads!
我的独眼同仁通知我办不到 Evidently, my cycloptic colleague informs me that that can't be done.
我到底雇用你们来做什么？ Can you remind me what I pay you people for?
真的，告诉我 Honestly, throw me a bone here.
我们到底还有什么？ What do we have?
鲈鱼 Sea bass.
好的 Right
变种鲈鱼 They are mutated sea bass.
真的？脾气坏吗？ Really? Are they ill-tempered?
坏得很 Absolutely.
对他们可是个好的开始 That's a start.
警卫，启动缓慢的滴水装置 All right, guard begin the unnecessarily slow-moving dipping mechanism.
关上水槽 Close the tank!
你不看？他们可能逃走 Aren't you even going to watch them?They could get away.
别理他们，没必要看他们死亡 I'm going to leave them alone...
我假设会照计划进行 and not actually witness them dying. I'm just going to assume it all went to plan.
我房里有枪，给我五秒钟去拿 I have a gun in my room. You give me five seconds, I'll get it.
我会回来让他们脑袋开花 I'll come back, boom! I'll blow their brains out.
史考特，你不懂，是不是？ You just don't get it, do you?
你不懂 You don't.
这一点也不麻烦 It's no hassle.
敲敲门 -Knock knock.
是谁？ -Who's there?
我告诉你有个人叫做"嘘" Let me tell you a little story about a man named shh!"
在你开始之前就嘘了 Even before you start, that was a preemptive shh!"
我有一整袋嘘声等着给你 Just know I have a whole bag of shh" with your name on it.
你有什么打算？ What's your plan?
首先我打算大便在裤子里 First, I plan to soil myself...
然后锁定下来想新计划 then I'm going to regroup and come up with a new plan.
有否其它想法? Any thoughts?
等一下 Wait a minute.
我带着这个以防万一 I always have this with me, just in case.
好，我懂了，我牙不好 I get it. I have bad teeth.
不，牙线可让我们荡到边缘 No, Austin. The floss is to swing ourselves onto the ledge.
好，抓紧 All right. Hold on.
好了，牙膏，哈啰 Got it. OK. Toothpaste.
柔道劈功 Judo chop!
抓紧 Hang on!
柔道绊倒 Judo trip.
不是"昏了头"的好时机 Not a good time to lose one's head.
的确 Indeed.
那不是"出头"的方式 That's not the way to get ahead in life.
不是 No
可惜他不够死脑筋 It's a shame he wasn't more headstrong.
他永远无法领导大企业 He'll never be the head of a major corporation.
好，够了 That'll do.
我们怎么办？ What are we going to do?
那边是紧急出口，去求救 There's an emergency exit. Go get help.
我留下来盯着邪恶博士 I'm going to stay here and keep an eye on Dr. Evil.
好，我尽快回来 I'll hurry back.
听着，凡妮莎 Listen Vanessa,
不论发生什么事 Whatever happens, I want you to know...
关于意大利妞的事我很抱歉 that I feel really bad about that ltalian bird.
我要说的是 What I'm trying to say is...
如果你要我只爱一个女人 that if you want me to be a one-woman man...
那就太妙了，宝贝 that's just groovy, baby.
乖一点 Behave.
来，大家撤回主室 Come, everyone.Let us repair to the main chamber.
火神计划即将展开 Project Vulcan is about to begin.
史考特，想看爸靠什么维生吗？ Scott, don't you want to see what Daddy does for a living?
谁要看 Blow me.
你说什么？ Excuse me?
让我看 Show me.
好 OK
将火神定位 Position the Vulcan.
弹头带进来 Bring in the warhead.
哈啰，哈啰 Hello Hello
你好，鲍尔先生 Hello Mr.Powers
想爽一下吗？ Care to have a little fun?
不，我得拯救世界 No, actually... I have to save the world.
这里面很冷吗？ Is it cold in here?
组装探测器 Arm the probe.
不，我得去找邪恶博士 I've got to get Dr. Evil.
不，不，冲冷水澡，棒球 Baseball, cold showers.
放弃吧，鲍尔先生 Give it up, Mr. Powers.
柴契尔在冬天裸体 Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day.
各位 Gentlemen.
备枪发射吧 Let's lock and load.
好，弟兄们 Right, lads.
不要走 留下来 -Don't go. -Stay with us.
请不要走 Please don't go.
你抗拒不了我们，鲍尔先生 You can't resist us.
正好相反，宝贝 Au contraire, baby.
你们抗拒不了我 I think you can't resist me.
奥斯汀 Austin
凡妮莎 Vanessa
事情不是你看到的样子 It's not what it seems.
稍息 At ease, boys.
你也是 Likewise.
我闯进来抓邪恶博士 Vanessa, I can explain. What happened was I broke in trying to get to Dr. Evil.
突然女机器人跑来胸部冒烟 Then all of a sudden, the fembots came by and smoke started to come out of their jumblies.
于是我想以色情对抗色情 So I thought I'd work my mojo to counter their mojo.
交叉色情，她们的头开始爆炸 We got cross-mojonations, and their heads started exploding.
到最后我只剩内裤 You know, that thing, and I ended up in my knickers here...
好，我相信你，穿衣服 I believe you. Now get dressed.
帅，宝贝 Smashing, baby.
前进，弟兄们 Onward, boys.
发射地下探测器 Launching the subterranean probe.
展开初步表面穿透 Begin initial surface penetration.
三分钟后地下爆炸，倒数 Subterranean nuclear detonation in three minutes and counting.Watch out!
还击 Right front!
我绊倒了 Oh, I tripped!
开门 Open the frickin' door!
开始摧毁世界 Probe destruction beginning in...
取消 Judo!
6,5,4,3,2,1 6，5，4，3，2，1
取消，取消 Abort.
抓邪恶博士吧 Now to Dr. Evil.
晚饭 Din-din.
我要鸡肉和肝，请给我 I want chicken, I want liver.Meow Mix, Meow Mix, please deliver.
逮到你了，邪恶博士 I've got you now, Dr. Evil.
做得好，鲍尔先生 Well done, Mr. Powers.
你和我并没那么不同 We're not so different, you and l.
真讽刺，你代表的一切 However, isn't it ironic, the very things you stand for...
自由性爱，放荡，派对 free love, swinging parties
到90年代都被认为是… are all now in the nineties considered to be...
邪恶的 evil?
不，我们不要你这种LKK(老古董) What we swingers were rebelling against...
只爱钱的人统治世界 is uptight squares like you... whose bag was money and world domination.
我们纯真 We were innocent, man.
要是知道性爱自由的后果 If we'd known the consequences of our sexual liberation...
我们作风会不同，但精神不变 we would have done things differently but the spirit would've remained the same.
那是自由，宝贝 It's freedom, baby.
认了吧，自由失败了 Face it.Freedom failed.
不，自由没失败 No, man, freedom didn't fail.
如今有自由和责任，帅呆了 Right now, we've got freedom and responsibility.It's a very groovy time.
没有比老嬉皮更可悲的事 There's nothing more pathetic than an aging hipster.
好，秃驴，闭上你的乌鸦嘴 All right, baldy. Shut your cakehole.
快，要走了 Come on. Let's go. On your bike.
别这么快 Not so fast.
看来局势扭转了 It seems the tables have turned, Mr. Powers.
动手，别担心我 Go ahead, Austin. Don't worry about me.
可以拿电视游乐器吗？爸 I can take my Sega, right, Dad?
看来局势又扭转了 It seems the tables have turned again, Dr. Evil.
杀了这混蛋，看我在不在乎 Not really. Kill the little bastard.See what I care.
我们不是从治疗团体中了解对方？ But, Dad, we just had a breakthrough in group.
我除掉了那个团体，没礼貌 I had the group liquidated, you little shit.They were insolent.
我恨你 I hate you!
我希望我没被人工创造出来 I wish I was never artificially created in a lab.
你那么说很伤爸的心，真的 Scott, that hurts Daddy when you say that, honestly.
二号，你时间抓得真准 Your timing is impeccable.
快干掉鲍尔先生 Go ahead. Take Mr. Powers away.
不 No
什么？ 邪恶博士，我花了三十年 What?Dr. Evil, I've spent 30 years of my life...
把邪恶帝国变成跨国企业 turning this two-bit evil empire into a world-class multinational.
我本来要上资本家杂志封面 I was going to have a cover story in Forbes.
但你这个白痴想接掌世界 But, you, like an idiot, wanted to take over the world...
你不知道没有世界了 and you don't realize there is no world anymore.
只有企业 It's only corporations.
闭嘴，二号 Silence, Number Two!
我受够了让你摆布我 I've had enough of you pushing me around.
鲍尔先生 Mr.Powers.
有个商业提议你可能感兴趣 I have a business proposition you might find very interesting.
我受够了 All right. I've had enough.
柔道劈功 Judo chop!
大楼将自毁 The complex will self-destruct.
赶快走 Let's split! Let's go!
这边要爆炸了 This place is going to blow!
大楼将自毁 The complex will self-destruct.
走 Come on
这边，奥斯汀 This way, Austin.
宝贝，要爆炸了，快 Come on, baby! It's gonna blow!Let's go. Move it!
三个月后
我爱你，鲍尔先生 I love you, Mr. Powers.
我爱你，鲍尔太太 And I love you, Mrs. Powers.
是贝索艾斯 That'll be Basil Exposition.
别理他，回到床上 Ignore it, Austin. Come back to bed.
任务在身，宝贝 Duty calls, baby.
你好，奥斯汀 Hello Austin
希望我没打搅你们的蜜月 I hope I'm not interrupting your honeymoon.
没有 No, not at all, Basil.
收到我送的水果篮没？ Did you get that fruit basket I sent you?
有，但你送太多了 Yes, we did, Basil, but you sent too much.
我得送给我妈 I'm gonna have to send some to my mother.
别忘了这个 Don't forget these.
谢谢 Thanks.
不要紧 There you go.
收到我别的礼物没？ Did you get my other gift?
收到了 We did.
对，不错的调味罐架 Yes, Basil, nice rack.
但谁给我们这幅画，奇怪 But who in the world gave us this drawing?It's bizarre.
邪恶博士搭火箭逃脱后 As you know, Dr. Evil has escaped in his rocket...
从追踪系统上消失了 which has disappeared from our tracking system.
哎呀，等等，咖啡？ Hold on. Coffee?
麻烦你 Yes please
谢谢 Thank you
凡妮莎，你升为全职干员了 And, Vanessa, by the way, you have been made a full agent.
太好了，谢谢 That's fantastic! Thanks.
牛奶？ Milk?
麻烦你 Yes please
奥斯汀，女皇要封你为爵士 And, Austin, Her Majesty the Queen informs me that you are to be knighted.
帅呆了 Very shagadelic!
祝你们好运 The best of luck to both of you!
谢谢 贝索艾斯 Thanks, Basil.
再见 Bye
我忘不了第一次见到你时 You know, Vanessa... I'll never forget the first time I saw you.
你不可思议的美 You were so incredibly beautiful...
不可思议的性感 so incredibly sexy...
我知道我要得到你 I knew I had to have you...
迫不及待的 right then and there.
你有同样的感觉吗？ Did you feel the same way?
我只不停的在意你的牙 Actually, I couldn't stop staring at your teeth.
我点了香槟，进来 I ordered some champagne. Come in!
太好了 Lovely, Austin.
放那边就行了，谢谢 Right over there's fine. Thank you.
到阳台上吧，夜色很美 Let's go out on the terrace. It's a beautiful night.
可以看星星 We can look at the stars.
好主意 Smashing idea, baby.
看看你 Look at you.
当心 Look out!
很痛哎 That really hurt!
我那边会肿起来，白痴 I'm going to have a lump there, you idiot.
谁丢的鞋？老实讲 Who throws a shoe? Honestly.
你打架跟女人一样 You fight like a woman.
奥斯汀 Austin
这真的，不是我的 Honestly, it's not mine.
不，用它 No, use it.
瞧夜空多美 Look how beautiful the night sky is.
那不是北斗七星吗？ Isn't that the Big Dipper?
对，像"舔完星" Yeah, and that looks just like Uranus.
奥斯汀 Austin
你知道嘛 Ok,you know
我从没看过那颗大星星 I've never seen that big star before.
那是什么？ What is that?
老天哪 Good God.
我会对付你，奥斯汀保威 I'm gonna get you, Austin Powers.
这里面冷死了，比哥先生 It's frickin' freezing in here, Mr. Bigglesworth.
Darling, you look fabulous.
All right. There we go.
Look at that face. Show me. Come on.
There. Bit of hair.
Smashing.
It's coming around now.
It's not working!
Go change. There you go.
Can you change her? ls that all right?
Very good.
And right here. Looking right there.
I'm not even looking.
You're wicked!
You got your mojo working overtime, darling.
I'm not even shooting it. It's insane.
Smashing.
Can I get a smile?
Come on, you boys. Get together.
Good. Lovin' it.
Let's make a Vanessa sandwich.
The winged horn.
Come on, Austin. Give it to me.
Oh, behave.
You're an animal!
That's it.
Just the top of the hair.
Born and shoot.
Try it one more time.
And born and shoot.
That's it.
Let's go. Come on.
Ignore this.
Ignore me doing this.
Fabulous, darling.
Show me the eye.
Never get up. I'm spent!
We'll take you, and we'll go out on the town...
and swing, baby.
Missis...
Will ya...
Make me tea?
Make love to me...
Put on the telly...
To the BBC?
BBC One.
BBC Two.
BBC Three.
BBC Four.
BBC Five.
BBC Six.
BBC Seven.
BBC heaven.
Missis...
Will ya...
Make me tea?
Make love to me...
Put on the telly...
To the BBC?
BBC One.
BBC Two.
BBC Three.
BBC Four.
BBC Five.
BBC Six.
BBC Seven.
BBC heaven.
Missis...
Will ya...
Make me tea?
Make love to me...
Put on the telly...
To the BBC?
BBC One.
BBC Two.
What is that?
Good God.
I'm gonna get you, Austin Powers.
It's frickin' freezing in here, Mr. Bigglesworth.
Darling, you look fabulous.